Reflections on Autumn

"What was, is not, and never again will be; what is, is change," Edwin Way Teale

It is fall. I love the autumn and have always thought as my favorite season. I love the last bits of summer.... the soft lighting in this time of year, the sound of the crunching leaves, the great harvest foods, pumpkins, corn stalks and brightly colored gourds. Oh, don't forget the corn...both Indian corn with its pattern of color and candy corn which, in our Kirkbride family, reminds us of all we have to be thankful for. I love it that it is time for an occasional sweater at night but warm enough in the day to still be in shirtsleeves. The walks on the ranch are marvelous... the grasses so many different hues of color and the wind is still tolerable. I love it because this time of year there are hot drinks like pumpkin spices lattes and hot apple cider. In my world there is the Festival of Trees (our fundraiser for work) to prepare for so the creative juices begin to flow. Dan's birthday is October 7th. Isn't that a perfect time for a celebration? He hits right as the changing of the leaves are their most brilliant. Lucky boy! Besides all of this there is the anticipation of the holidays and the thought that I can soon play Christmas music!

What I can't seem to get over it that soon it will be winter and then it will be cold and those of you who know me know I truly dislike the cold. I find myself having a sense of dread and feeling incredibly sad some of these days.I am missing Dad Kirkbride and finding at every turn that the wicked are prospering, so many friends as so very sick and evil abounds. Aren't we complex creatures?!?! I always tell Dan that I can kind of deal with November (the dark month) and December (the twinkly month with all the Christmas lights) because I love Christmas so much and the hope that it brings. But then there is January through March to face. It is so much like life... this changing of the seasons. The start of new life, the living, the dying and then the rebirth each spring. I have a friend who says it well....

"There is a tension in autumn between the beauty we observe and the tinge of anxiety we feel that things are changing rapidly, that indeed time is speeding up. The leaves that were still green a week ago, are brilliant reds and yellows today. The leaves that were brilliant reds and yellows last week are gone today. Autumn reminds us that change is the norm in life, but it also reminds us of the beauty that can be experienced in the midst of change. We have numerous opportunities this time of year to practice living and being in the present moment." Scott Stoner

So instead of dread about the fallow time of the year to come I am going to try to live in the present, enjoy what is now and know that what dies will indeed bring forth new life... even more life than last year. That the dying is a necessary process in the life of every Christian. My flowers will be bigger and stronger and the trees will be taller and more mature. I pray that can can be more mature in Christ, more conformed to His image as I take some time to die a bit more to self as well.