Ode to Joy

Joy Ellis December 15, 1950- June 4, 2012

Committed Christ follower

Sweet and gentle spirit

Devoted mother of her two wonderful girls Amanda and Sarah

Loving wife to Philip

Proud Grandmother of Lincoln and Ellis

Kind daughter and daughter in law

Dedicated teacher... A teachers heart to the core

Caring and thoughtful friend

Reflections of Lynn Kirkbride

Joy welcomed me with open arms when I started dating the former husband of her dear friend, Pam, 20 years ago...that was a most gracious gesture. She embraced me as a close friend from the start and that was that. She never made me feel the lesser for being Dan's second wife. She continued to love Pam's girls in a most special way. She was their mother's dear friend and she kept her alive for the girls without imposing or making me feel bad. She was always there cheering Hannah and Abby on and was invested in all aspects of their lives.  I know they will miss her keen interest in their lives and her tender care. I love it that one of the great last pictures we have of her is with her family at Hannah's wedding last fall. It was a happy day for her too....I like to imagine her now in heaven giving Pam a full account of her girls upon their reunion.

Joy with Sarah and her family at Hannah's wedding

Joy and I were always too busy. Sometimes too busy for each other but we still always maintained our connection. We shared the frustration that there were never enough hours in the day to do all that we wanted to do. Yet matter how busy we both were, we exchanged birthday and Christmas gifts every year.  Joy' s gifts to me were always wrapped with a real cloth ribbon and had a meaningful note attached written in a felt tipped marker pen in her wonderful calligraphy. How I will miss looking for a special gift for her and receiving her special packages. Can't forget the famous Joy Toll House pie that she gave us every year at Christmas either! I won’t forget that the four of us tried hard to go away for a weekend when we each turned 50.  Those were fun weekends always involving nice meals, usually staying at a Bed and Breakfast and shopping, of course. I am not sure if we ever got my 50^th celebrated. She and Philip celebrated every New Year’s Eve with us.  I always had my fondue party and it was always a challenge to see if we could get Philip to come out if there was any chance of snow and actually stay up till midnight. Those are happy couple memories. 

Joy was a highly creative spirit even though it often meant staying up late to do it. She was a talented seamstress making anything from clothes to dolls and all sorts of folk crafts. This theme was evident in every aspect of her life. Inviting, warm, cozy. Her home reflected her touch. She and her girls would get together and do special craft projects or baking so even her relationships centered around this theme. Her clothes reflected her style, her kindergarten room at school was a fairyland of creativity. I always threatened her that I was going to enroll in her class. Who wouldn't have wanted to play and learn in Mrs. Ellis's classroom? 

Joy loved the color red. She loved anything with cherries on it and had a special fondness for cookie cutters.  She loved calico, gingham, plaid and all things antique and country.  She loved to bake and was known not only for her toll house pie but for her butter horns, oatmeal cake and macadamia nut cookies. We can't forget her cooking either and the church potlucks will suffer without her chicken enchiladas! She was a homemaker extraordinaire long before Martha Stewart.  Her wedding gift to Hannah reflected her style and love too. She and the girls wrote out in their own script many of the Ellis women favorite recipes. What a treasure that is! I must admit I made my own copy.

Some of my personal most precious memories of Joy were after our house fire in 2006. She and I went antiquing and shopping to Ft. Collins on numerous occasions to find me treasures for the house that were old and had character. She shared my concern that the house not look like a furniture store. She even spied a glass basket one day in one of the Ft. Collins flea markets which she knew was exactly like one I had that held many special memories.  Together we thought that God was compensating me in a small way for all the loss in that find.  We had great fun going to all of her favorite Colorado haunts on this big mission. We even met Amanda and Sarah in Greeley one day with Hannah for lunch and shopping. Of course, we would stop for a good coffee along the way because Joy and I shared a love for good fresh coffee and loved to give each other coffee gifts. We even shared them with Philip occasionally but '07 was a particularly special year for our friendship.

Joy was known for all of these things and many more...wonderful reflections of the kind and gentle spirit within her. But I think that her love for Christ most shaped the way that she approached life.  She was seriously determined to live out His love and reflect His glory in all things. I think that is why she did things with such perfection and with such focus. I think that is why she was often hard on herself. She wanted to reflect His fragrance in all she touched. Joy did it quietly, intentionally, often privately and very deliberately.  

Joy’s connection to grace made her a person that loved others with a singular focus as well. There were the many children that she taught either at the school or in Sunday School or in 4-H that benefitted from Mrs. Ellis attention and care. Always wanting to bring out the best in others and help them along in their life journey whether students or friends.  Joy especially loved her daughters like that.  Sarah wonders now what it will be like to miss out on that love in her everyday life. She told me that she and Amanda have always known that their mother loved them completely unconditionally. I think that having been loved like that is imprinted on their souls.  They will never forget.  Maybe I can return the favor and love her girls like she did Pam's all these many years.  Joy loved Philip like that too. I can hardly imagine them one without the other.

At Christmas I gave Joy the Ann Voskamp book 1,000 Gifts and a journal to list her gifts.  In about February she told that that she had really needed that message and that she was busy listing her gifts in her journal. I was so thrilled to be able to give her something meaningful for her journey through the terrible illness. She told me that it helped her so much that she bought both Amanda and Sarah a copy of the book so that they could journal theirs too.  Philip reports that she got over 900 gifts listed in less than six months.  Remarkable! Especially coming from a woman with terminal cancer.  God offered her His grace and Joy was more than happy to reach out and take it.  That was Joy living life to the fullest right to the end …. but you know I can't help but wonder if we think she was awesome on earth wait till we meet her in heaven….. 

I will miss you "sweet friend...."

Love,

Taken on one of our Birthday Getaways 2007